Today I have sat in my study more than not and it has felt like the right place to be...
I have also planned my imminent return to work, with a new completion date of Friday 12 October... It seems a gazillion years away but actually that still means I only have 9 weeks to write three and a half chapters, and over four weeks to edit, with 2 weeks in Italy in there somewhere too :) I did want to have it finished before going on holiday but that would mean having to finish by the 13 of Sept, so all writing would have to be done by the 13 Aug at the latest which only gives me 7 weeks. This is not enough!
Am pretty scared but know this is more time that I had before so should be doable? And I do need a certain amount of pressure and also *to get it finished*! I would love to get it submitted before going on holiday... but that two/three weeks of editing time could be invaluable - if not, i'll have it finished! I wonder as well if there might be some merit to having it all written and half edited, then beggering off for two weeks of sun, then coming back all refreshed and objective and then having ten days/two weeks to re-read, edit and have some perspective on it all? And my Sup could have a look at it while am off as well. And it wouldn't ruin my holiday because I would be practically finished, all written just sorting out refs etc. (good incentive to be organised.)
I think I have to think about this in practical terms - in terms of actually getting it done - in a good time frame and think this is better than not getting it done in a short time frame ;0) Does mean the house move to the South will have to be postponed which pisses me off but I don't think DB will mind.
BUT anyway, I have a plan :) I have written out deadline times for each chapter and new working hours. I am to start back proper tomorrow! I am soooo skeered and bored to DEATH already!
So, today my plan was to skive, tidy the house and make a work plan. Tomorrow my plan is to work and go for a swim/run.
I should probably have a better plan than just 'work'... Right. I have 14 pages to edit of the discussion chapter. I am starting with this to get my brain back into what the feck this PhD is about. So if I do 3 pages a day then that totals 4 days and a bit. I have tomorrow, Sunday, Tues and Weds. So that's fine then. Righty, tomorrow I plan to do 4 pages of editing, 2 in the morning, and 2 in the afternoon (post swim).
A plan.
I have made an actual decision today, not really consciously I think but a decision nonetheless, to finish my PhD. I will finish it because DB looks despairing and utterly perplexed when I say I don't want to do it any more, and I understand why (though i know my reasons to stop are valid too); because i really want to get a job now, being a stay at home mum would be lush but I am not very good at playing with bricks and making dens all day, I get grumpy; I think having a PhD will help me get a better paid job that I enjoy and hopefully has some responsibility and can do part-time but still earn a decent wage; I would like the self respect that I finished it; and I would always wonder why I couldn't do it when every bugger else around me has. What if I could do it, but didn't?
So I think I should work at it, try my best, and hand in whatever I have got and if it is shit, well I tried and what have I got to lose? Esepecially at this stage; I have written the research chapters up, and the discussion chapter, I only have the explaining chapters to do (lit review, methodology, intro and concl. references and appendices).
AND... I fancy writing again. I like writing.
x J
I have also planned my imminent return to work, with a new completion date of Friday 12 October... It seems a gazillion years away but actually that still means I only have 9 weeks to write three and a half chapters, and over four weeks to edit, with 2 weeks in Italy in there somewhere too :) I did want to have it finished before going on holiday but that would mean having to finish by the 13 of Sept, so all writing would have to be done by the 13 Aug at the latest which only gives me 7 weeks. This is not enough!
Am pretty scared but know this is more time that I had before so should be doable? And I do need a certain amount of pressure and also *to get it finished*! I would love to get it submitted before going on holiday... but that two/three weeks of editing time could be invaluable - if not, i'll have it finished! I wonder as well if there might be some merit to having it all written and half edited, then beggering off for two weeks of sun, then coming back all refreshed and objective and then having ten days/two weeks to re-read, edit and have some perspective on it all? And my Sup could have a look at it while am off as well. And it wouldn't ruin my holiday because I would be practically finished, all written just sorting out refs etc. (good incentive to be organised.)
I think I have to think about this in practical terms - in terms of actually getting it done - in a good time frame and think this is better than not getting it done in a short time frame ;0) Does mean the house move to the South will have to be postponed which pisses me off but I don't think DB will mind.
BUT anyway, I have a plan :) I have written out deadline times for each chapter and new working hours. I am to start back proper tomorrow! I am soooo skeered and bored to DEATH already!
So, today my plan was to skive, tidy the house and make a work plan. Tomorrow my plan is to work and go for a swim/run.
I should probably have a better plan than just 'work'... Right. I have 14 pages to edit of the discussion chapter. I am starting with this to get my brain back into what the feck this PhD is about. So if I do 3 pages a day then that totals 4 days and a bit. I have tomorrow, Sunday, Tues and Weds. So that's fine then. Righty, tomorrow I plan to do 4 pages of editing, 2 in the morning, and 2 in the afternoon (post swim).
A plan.
I have made an actual decision today, not really consciously I think but a decision nonetheless, to finish my PhD. I will finish it because DB looks despairing and utterly perplexed when I say I don't want to do it any more, and I understand why (though i know my reasons to stop are valid too); because i really want to get a job now, being a stay at home mum would be lush but I am not very good at playing with bricks and making dens all day, I get grumpy; I think having a PhD will help me get a better paid job that I enjoy and hopefully has some responsibility and can do part-time but still earn a decent wage; I would like the self respect that I finished it; and I would always wonder why I couldn't do it when every bugger else around me has. What if I could do it, but didn't?
So I think I should work at it, try my best, and hand in whatever I have got and if it is shit, well I tried and what have I got to lose? Esepecially at this stage; I have written the research chapters up, and the discussion chapter, I only have the explaining chapters to do (lit review, methodology, intro and concl. references and appendices).
AND... I fancy writing again. I like writing.
x J
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