I have just realised why, perhaps, all of a sudden my work is so appealing!
May have something to do with the fact that my darling boy has succumbed to the terrible twos (all of a sudden this weekend... he is two next month so not doing too badly really) and is, ahem, becoming rather a handful! So being here, working, ALONE, in silence, with no-one desperately clinging to my leg saying 'mummymummymummy' then shouting at me when I go to pick him up (how dare I misread the situation so?!) for obviously squashing his independence is really quite lovely. You see, here I am being a Grown Up, and entering a land that is otherwise barred to me as the stay-at-home Mum-to-a-toddler. Previously, being with my Bean has been by far the preferred option, him being so lovely and funny and caring and kind and just yumptiousness. And now, all of a sudden, he is so confusing! And so very demanding and yet if I respond I have probably got it wrong and deserve a good growling at. This work is lovely respite and really rather straightforward. And it doesn't answer back. Or make me feel guilty (all guilt feelings from me, not purposefully induced by him!) And if I want to make a cup of coffee then I absolutely can, without negotiating with anyone (I'm going to make a coffee then I shall be straight back for cuddles and yes of course I will watch Abney and Teal the rainbow episode with you for the gazillionth time). And I just feel like ME.
Hurrah.
Am not procrastinating btw. Am pontificating. Reflecting. Rationalising and analysing *everything* that happens to me, as is my wont as a researcher ;0)
x J
May have something to do with the fact that my darling boy has succumbed to the terrible twos (all of a sudden this weekend... he is two next month so not doing too badly really) and is, ahem, becoming rather a handful! So being here, working, ALONE, in silence, with no-one desperately clinging to my leg saying 'mummymummymummy' then shouting at me when I go to pick him up (how dare I misread the situation so?!) for obviously squashing his independence is really quite lovely. You see, here I am being a Grown Up, and entering a land that is otherwise barred to me as the stay-at-home Mum-to-a-toddler. Previously, being with my Bean has been by far the preferred option, him being so lovely and funny and caring and kind and just yumptiousness. And now, all of a sudden, he is so confusing! And so very demanding and yet if I respond I have probably got it wrong and deserve a good growling at. This work is lovely respite and really rather straightforward. And it doesn't answer back. Or make me feel guilty (all guilt feelings from me, not purposefully induced by him!) And if I want to make a cup of coffee then I absolutely can, without negotiating with anyone (I'm going to make a coffee then I shall be straight back for cuddles and yes of course I will watch Abney and Teal the rainbow episode with you for the gazillionth time). And I just feel like ME.
Hurrah.
Am not procrastinating btw. Am pontificating. Reflecting. Rationalising and analysing *everything* that happens to me, as is my wont as a researcher ;0)
x J
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