Monday, 28 November 2011

life laundary

This morning I woke up and felt really stressed!  I am looking after bean today and *hate* being stressy on those, most precious of days...

So I have sorted out lots of issues and am feeling back in control again. 

I still have so much work to do and this is scaring me.  I cannot do anything about that when I cannot physically work.  But I have decided to work monday evenings and wednesday evenings, and try at those times to leave any Bean stuff to DB.  When he gets back from work, we have a coffee and a chat and then I am upstairs until I feel I want to stop - but doubt that would be before 9pm.  That should give me at *least* 2.5 hours to work, more like 3.  Tonight I will prbably work until 10ish.  As I get more stressed I shall also work friday evenings.  I can't work tues or thurs evenings because that is when DB plays footie, so phew for that ;0) 

Weekends  I would like to work 9-2, a straight five hours on a saturday.  Then maybe I'll go back up at 6pm for the evening.  And on Sunday...  well, it's a bit when and if I can at the mo, until the pressure ratchets up I am sure I shall work sundays more too - just at the mo it feels like shift work looking after Bean - he seems to rarely be with both of us at the same time and sunday should be a family day for the mo.  And DB needs to exercise and have some time to work too. 

Exercise-wise I have decided to run home from dropping bean off with the childminder.  If I take a slightly circuitous route then I can get a decent half hour run in, get back, shower and be at my desk for 10.45 at the latest.  This would be brilliant as a) I have no other time to exercise seeing as every spare minute is either with bean or working now; b) now is the best time to be running with all this stress - I need to release the toxins and pressure - it worked a treat during my Masters; and c, working after running is great as running helps you concentrate apparently.  So even though i lose 15 mins or so a day I would gain this in not faffing so much from being sloth-like and tired, or stressy.  AND then I can eat choc while working to stay motivated but have worked it off beforehand!  Hurrah!

This week is a big week and I plan to work very hard so come Friday I feel back in control again.  I shall still have monumental amounts of work to do but I hope that I will feel that I am someway to making progress.  This week I am reading my theory notes.  I shall take what I need, capitalise on buzzwords and major strands of thought and incorporate them into my own analyses to make me sound well clever and considered ;0)  I need to re-aquaint myself with these thinkers before I can write my next chapter, then can re-write my last chapter (should only take a day to add in the odd quote and buff up the existing analyses) and both will be done to a nice, polished standard.  Then, come Bean's beeday on the 15 Dec, I hope to send them both off to my sup and start on my discussion chapter.

Am feeling so much better.  Still swamped, but my head is above water and I am going to do everything I can to stay that way until the end.

x J

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