Sunday, 2 September 2012

There is No Motivation; Just Determination :)

I came to my desk at 6ish and have been working pretty well, considering.

I am pretty sulky because my head wants to party after all the hard work I put into my lit review.  Is like having exams back-to-back and Just Not Fair.  It is also hard to come back to writing after editing.  It is a totally different form of work and you really have to keep urging yourself to editing and just write!  I will edit for ages even though the work I have done on this chapter is minimal and only rough.  Silly waste of time.  I have also been struggling not to be sidetracked, so doing my ten min rule religiously then letting myself wander all over the internet for as long as I need until I remember why I am here :)  Is only about 20 mins away tops which is ok for just starting back.  The gap will shorten as I get some typing rhythm going.

But for today I managed to complete a decent introduction (it was already pretty good which was a godsend) and then make the intro the structure of the chapter with headings and subheadings.  Now all I have to do is the colouring in :) I am pleased for now because sorting out this structure normally takes me a really long time, but because it is there I can literally start typing.

To help me work, as of now, I am going to:
  • Take my mound of notes (nearly a foot high?!) and if I see an 'important' piece of paper type it into my chapter under a heading.  Chuck anything waffly/repeated.
  • Not worry about style or flow, just freewrite stuff.
  • Remember that this chapter is really descriptive and doesn't really need much individual thinking or analysis. It is a 'backbone' chapter, providing the support to the ideas chapters and analyses that branch off it.  SO DON'T OVER ANALYSE/COMPLICATE THINGS.
  • Just think of this as a getting words down on paper mission.  As many words as possible.  make sense of them later.  Let's get the bulk down and then edit, edit, edit :)
Ooh I feel good now I know what I am doing.  I have some brain storms next to me of reasons I am using certain theories (I do not remember writing this, nor why I am using certain theories... so hurray for the other 'me' that did this work!)  which I will type up tomorrow.

I cannot tell you how much it hurts me to think I have to come back to work tomorrow.  Even though I have finished a chapter and realised I don't have to do another one, I STILL can't have a day off :(  Being motivated to come back day after day is so tricky, and I tell you I am chuffed if I have done 30 mins work in two hours.  All the momentum and motivation I had with the last chapter fizzled out when it finished.  Fizzled. 

Momentum and motivation are hard won.  You will NOT be motivated 'just like that'.  In fact I hardly believe in motivation.  It is so brief and unreliable!  Better thinking there is no motivation, just determination :)

Oh yeah!

x J

 

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