Saturday 15 Nov - Two and a Half weeks in...

hallooo!!

So we are two and half weeks in - I can't believe that is all we have been here for! we have done and seen and learnt so much! We are still in Pondy, enjoying the sites and gorging on 'finger fries' and 'secret tea' (beer in teapots so the police don't get wind of it?!) and, admittedly, cigarettes (I know), until we head back to Chennai tomorrow - the land of saintly goodness. In Chennai there is no beer really (is some kind of prohibition going on), no finger fries, and as a lady it is unbecoming for me to smoke - which I don't if I am not drinking secret tea anyway, so there. So back to the land of goodliness - and volunteering on Monday! Eek! they haven't told us when to turn up so I shall go along about mid morning and take it from there! I hope I don't get stuck doing admin. This is my biggest fear I think. Answering phones and being all customer service. NOOOOO! I hope I get to do hands-on stuff.

Am quite nervous about the volunteering really.

I am also having a total quandry about my theory. I just cannot work out where I stand. I seem to be in the middle of a few theories but not commiting to any in particular. So I have to do a lot of reading about that. And I would say folks- anyone wanting some sage advice plus a bit of philosophy thrown in I suggest reading 'Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenence'. It is a novel but written by someone who is clearly a scholar and been through what we are all going through, he is very wise and talks about philosophy a lot (realism/rationalism/idealsim etc) and also has lovely nuggets of calming info such as his advice about 'stuckness' which concludes with him saying that stuckness is a good thing and things will always become unstuck and clear in your mind in the end. And he talks about how work creates a sense of peace of mind when you know it is right, because you care about it. Because you care, you are looking for it to be right, and you are looking for that feeling of 'peace'. I imagine that is how I would feel when I have completed my final draft of my PhD... Although maybe a bit mad at first, then a bit drunk, then very drunk, and then at peace (hungover/asleep).

Assuming I'm not up the stick of course. Then I would go out and eat a lot, which always creates a kind of peace when the sugar/carb-rush has subsided.

So yes, read the book - it's by... Arg, his name. I don't know, it's a weird one. Pop it into google anyway - I would suggest everyone read it if you are feeling a little disconnected from your work. Or just as a nice reference book to look at when you feel blue and he tells you 'well, learning is hard' and you think, 'yeah! it's hard!' and he advises you leave it for a bit so thoughts can work themselves out. I like that.

Well, better read sommat about Critical Theory. Please be the one, PLEASE.

x J