Same old Same old!

Well, this was meant to be my last week before I started maternity leave... And it still is my last week - but I haven't done any work!

So embarrassed, I am officially the crappest PhD student in the history of PhD students. Seeing as I don't study my PhD... BUT in my defence I have realised maybe it is because I don't have to?!

I was under orders from my sup to write as much down as I can now, before going on maternity leave. Which I thought was a fab idea and each day this week I have gone to do just that - to no avail... So I went for a walk yesterday to clear my head and get some focus and motivation for the afternoon after yet another unproductive morning, but came back none the wiser. THEN it occured to me last night that perhaps I have nothing to splurge?! That perhaps I am organised and up to date with my work and have no 'loose ends'? Seeing as whenever I think to do some writing I think 'oh, well I have that written in my chapter plan' or 'I have that down already'. Albeit in note form, but there nonetheless and ready for some fluffing when I have reaquainted mytself with the sources better etc. I know exactly where I am with each chapter and even each chapter has in it at least a thousand words of guff I tend to add as I go along, after sup meetings and when I rejig my chapters.

So maybe I am not working because the work is already done! Am not saying I have written out to the Nth degree everything I can think of to do with my PhD, that would be silly. But I have written out everything I can that doesn't need hours of reading and books around me for references or new source material.

So my plan now is to dismantle my room ;0) I cannot wait. Unfortunately DB needs the room for his office now, but hopefully won't need as much room as me and I will still take down my notice board, calender and bits and bobs and put them in my drawers. I will check that each of my chapter draws is looking tidy and accessible (they are) , that they have book lists in them if necessary, and a brief explanation of where I am at with that chapter (all done as I went along). As long as I feel I can come back to it ok. I do want a certain level of mystery, I will need to get everything out and pore through it still,l after 9 months off, but hopefully this will all serve to reignite my brain fires and get me back into it - I won't be able to just plough on with it just from a chapter synopsis and book list anyway.

So think I am done! Will spend this afternoon packing stuff up and turning the room into a spare room and mini office for DB to work in - he is in Cornwall at the mo as his grandad passed away. He will be back this weekend and banished upstairs to work - I can't possibly relax and be on holiday when he is in the sitting room working away, taking work calls and huffing and puffing with stress etc. Is awful and makes me feel really guilty just lazing about reading or making cakes.

So that's me! Will probably come back for a whine and undoubtedly post a picture of my lickle baby when it comes... only 4/5 weeks now till my due date! Can't wait to give into the warm fuzziness that is baby brain... And can't wait to come back next year and carry one working, completel my PhD and be Dr Mum! Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

x J