DB talked to me last night and told me about this motivational something or other he has been listening to and it was pretty helpful really.
He said that this guy thinks that if you are doing anything difficult and huge then there will always be a 'dip' where you are stuck at the bottom and staring up feeling pretty helpless and useless. And that this Dip is inevitable and experienced by everyone doing the same thing. The idea is that you have to work out whether your situation is indeed a dip, or a cul-de-sac, in which case get the heck out ;0) I am not in a cul-de-sac and DB said that he will help me in any way he can, particularly with Bean, to make sure I can finish. The 'dip' chappy also said it is worth assessing your life when in this situation to see what can be trimmed or got rid of so you can focus on what matters. And so I have quit my super scary swimming club for now as it is an extra mental drain (I dread going and sometimes nearly cry when on my gazillionth timed lap) and challenge I really don't need, and will exercise in my own way in my own time. I can easily go back if I want to.
I don't think there is much else I can do other than try and work more on weekends if DB doesn't mind. I told him that really I just need lots of time over the next three months as this is really make or break time. If I am still dithering over this chapter or simply writing intros in three months then I have blown it. Until then...
Little bean is under the weather today, though he is at the childminder's nonetheless. She's closer than lots of our family to him now so it won't be a drain for him and he is her only child so I know he will be well looked after. I am better today and able to have some perspective. Also, I read an old chapter of mine last night as I need to remind myself of what it says for this chapter and actually it is very good and sets up this chapter nicely. That was pleasing. I have also decided to just get the PhD, rather than trying to set the world alight which was preventing me from working properly because I felt so stupid all the time. Just get it done, in any way I can!
If I did get this PhD I would be so very very pleased. This time next year it will all be over and history and I won't even remember today or yesterday.
So today I am going to start writing this empirical chapter and when I get stuck I shall do some more reading. I have some chocolate and it is all cosy inside out of the rain so I hope to get stuck in. I will be so proud when I have written this chapter! Tonight I have to type up pages of references into my endnote. Oh joy - but it is a big chore and when it is done I can relax that little bit more!
x J
He said that this guy thinks that if you are doing anything difficult and huge then there will always be a 'dip' where you are stuck at the bottom and staring up feeling pretty helpless and useless. And that this Dip is inevitable and experienced by everyone doing the same thing. The idea is that you have to work out whether your situation is indeed a dip, or a cul-de-sac, in which case get the heck out ;0) I am not in a cul-de-sac and DB said that he will help me in any way he can, particularly with Bean, to make sure I can finish. The 'dip' chappy also said it is worth assessing your life when in this situation to see what can be trimmed or got rid of so you can focus on what matters. And so I have quit my super scary swimming club for now as it is an extra mental drain (I dread going and sometimes nearly cry when on my gazillionth timed lap) and challenge I really don't need, and will exercise in my own way in my own time. I can easily go back if I want to.
I don't think there is much else I can do other than try and work more on weekends if DB doesn't mind. I told him that really I just need lots of time over the next three months as this is really make or break time. If I am still dithering over this chapter or simply writing intros in three months then I have blown it. Until then...
Little bean is under the weather today, though he is at the childminder's nonetheless. She's closer than lots of our family to him now so it won't be a drain for him and he is her only child so I know he will be well looked after. I am better today and able to have some perspective. Also, I read an old chapter of mine last night as I need to remind myself of what it says for this chapter and actually it is very good and sets up this chapter nicely. That was pleasing. I have also decided to just get the PhD, rather than trying to set the world alight which was preventing me from working properly because I felt so stupid all the time. Just get it done, in any way I can!
If I did get this PhD I would be so very very pleased. This time next year it will all be over and history and I won't even remember today or yesterday.
So today I am going to start writing this empirical chapter and when I get stuck I shall do some more reading. I have some chocolate and it is all cosy inside out of the rain so I hope to get stuck in. I will be so proud when I have written this chapter! Tonight I have to type up pages of references into my endnote. Oh joy - but it is a big chore and when it is done I can relax that little bit more!
x J
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