Sunday

Oh dear. I have had my bestest friends to stay for the weekend and they have gone now...

I am pretty bereft. I think that with moving etc etc I have been ok - but DB is in cornwall for the weekend and I am alone in our new house and I am seriously lonely. I think perhaps my feelings about my Dad's death are starting to kick in... I have been too busy to really think in the past month - so busy I can't believe we have been back for only a month. And now I am alone. It is not good. And tomorrow I have to start work properly! I don't know how that is going to happen. I don't feel like I have any head space - I am not thinking about anything in particular, but just have a buzzing in my head that is kind of like white noise, and makes it hard to concentrate on anything.

What to do? I just want it to go away. To be normal, and work and eat pizza and be happy.

Oh DB why do you have to be away?! I need you, you monkey. And will I tell you? Will I tell anyone that I am not ok? Will I 'eckers. I am a perfectionist control freak!

I am FINE.

x J