confused confused...??

I am, finally, touching base with the internet and starting to feel like the world is making sense again. I have been away traipsing all over gloucester and wiltshire for the past few days going to weddings and then avoiding the M5 on Saturday because it was just one giant traffic jam... Travelled, finally, down to cornwall yesterday. I have been eating fry ups every morning and full meals for lunch and dinner and feel like the size of a HOUSE. I haven't exercised either. However, I have been having a very lovely, very slovenly time that would be perfect if I weren't addicted to the internet and so incredibly worried about my work.

At the moment I have in the pipeline:
*Visa applications I am convinced will be turned down, jeopardising my whole PhD.
*An overseas fieldwork expenses claim I am convinced will be turned down because I had to put as part of my application that 'communications from their office were not forthcoming' - to explain why I was handing the form in now and not in June at the three month deadline... The office are cross with me for saying this but it is true and now I feel bad but IT IS TRUE! Hmmm.
*Am waiting to hear back from bulky waste people that I need mattresses and all sorts to be picked up by but they won't come and do it until I put everything on the pavement for 7am. DB and I have been making sure someone is always in the house as they said they would come and pick it up sometime last week and as they can pull up outside our garage we can just pull them out, into the van. Then they say they won't come and pick it up unless it is on the pavement 'outside my house' from 7am to 5pm, and 'kept dry for health and safety reasons'. How to keep two double matresses and a double divan bed base dry?!!!! In this windy, wet (not this weekend but generally eh) weather?!! They are INSANE. I have asked them for their advice on this and am curiously awaiting the answer. Also they want me to be up at 6 to be dragging this stuff to the pavement. Stupid evil people. Also they don't seem to realise that I have NO pavement, I am up a little side street and to put all these items (clue is in the title: 'bulky waste') on a pavement nearby would block the pavement, the road where people park and the access road to my and four other houses in time for both rush hours. How ridiculous. The thing is as well, that we live two seconds away from the tip but have a tiny car. We can't take it or we would. And now there is all this faff. So I am angry with them too and waiting thier snotty reply.
*I have had to write to my bank again with serious complaints. This is stressful and for all I know some kind of reply is waiting at home. Along with visas, passports that need to be signed for etc etc. I am NOT a happy 'holiday' bunny. I am worried!!

Arf.

I have finished whining now!

I feel that I have been away for EVER and EVER. But it has only been since Thursday evening. I have only missed one working day! How funny. I am so happy to be working again. I will work for a few hours this morning and am going for a three mile run later to get my body back to feeling like mine again...

One good thing is that last night I drove back to cornwall and it was a beautiful sunny day, so upon arriving I tucked into the vodka and coke and sat in the garden feeling all summery and, finally, here. I can relax. Had some more booze, ate some curry (bleugh. was tasty though) and then met some friends at the pub for a couple of hours - and didn't have a cigarette! Normally me + booze = fags. Especially when I have been abstaining for several hours to please certain family in-law members and then get let loose to see friends... But no! I hope to keep this up a bit you know. I think I may try and give up for good. We shall see.

Why is it that whenever I am away from home I feel completely dopey? Like trying to work now all I can think about is going downstairs and watching sky tv. why? I wouldn't do that at home so why here, now? Hmmm.

DB is going out to see his grandfolks with his ma in a bit. I am relieved from the granddaughterly-in law duties because I have to work. This is lovely as it means I will have the house to myself for hours. I haven't had a single moment to myself for days and days and am really looking forward to it! What shall I get up to?!!

DB has been perfectly lovely this past few days. We have decided that our house is an ogre pit of stress and evil and we will have to change our ways when we come back from TN. We live and work together too much now and we are too far away from friends who could otherwise dilute the atmosphere in our stressy nest. I love it when DB isn't working, he is so lovely. I am still an ogre though.

Better work I suppose.

Arg I feel so dopey. Who has been drugging me?! I am really irritated as well because I just cannot face eating for a while but my stupid tummy is really hungry. It is used to 1500kc meals (at least) every few hours now. WELL! It shall have to learn to not be so greedy again! hmmph. Moderation schmoderation.

x J