Marnin'

I am feeling much more chipper today. I have had some brekky,got up on time and have checked all my emails.

I had a lovely email from my Sup yesterday in reply to mine, saying that he looks forward to to reading my chap and thinks my plan to go to TN in Nov is very sensible. This is good as I am under no pressure but then again I want to finish this for him soon. Touching base is helpful as well just because sometimes, working at home, I can feel quite unmoored and adrift if you see what I mean. Like I am a mad professor (oops, given myself a promotion or three) who sits in a room writing complicated things and getting stressed - for whom exactly?! I feel better now and more focused.

My Sup also wrote that he was coming back to uni for a day to do an emergency plumbing job... By which I know he means he is going into uni while a plumber is working at his house but still, it made me chuckle and I wrote to him that it shows a lot about the state of academia when a professor such as he is taking on plumbing jobs at the uni during the holidays... (Yes, yes, I am sooooo funny). And he wrote back a little email about how his wife has to be on her own during her birthday and his house is all wet through and he doesn't know whether to wait for a plumber or just leave it for now... Or something (he writes a little round-the-houses sometimes, I blame it on too much abstract thinking). But I was so surprised because while I may email him a quip or something but I have never just had a pesonal email before. I was bizarrely flattered. My Sup is so lovely but is also like playing with a tiger... I would never presume us to be 'friends', but colleagues, and we have a laugh and talk as equals about theory and suchlike but I am also aware that he can be very acerbic and could sort of bring me into line quickly. I am never unaware of his authority. This is probably as much to do with the enormous respect I have for him as much as anything. He is like one of those teachers at school who is really friendly and kind until you seriously step over the mark and then 'whallop!' you are in trouble. And it means that much more.

This is why deadlines are so important to me. I bad word or criticism would be really awful!

Anyway, I am so chuffed by that little email but also worried and a bit sad that his wife had to spend her birthday all alone. I am also in a quandary because whenever anyone confesses a problem or dilemma to me I always immediately seem to set about ways I could fix it. It is not a bad trait but at the same time can be rather interfering or simply unnecessary. I sense I should just sit back on this one too but feel bad that Sup doesn't seem to have a decent plumber and is only down the road. I don't know any plumbers though. I am generally of no use whatsoever. But I feel bad like I am leaving him all alone. Oh dear. What to do?!! I am silly ;-s

...


What shall I do for today?!

I will work on writing out and analysing the discourses in reports that form the basis of this chapter (so I worked out yesterday). I am also running for 3 miles later.

Last night I did no work whatsoever, but I did buy a lovely maxi-skirt for ultra-conservative, tropical TN for £4 on ebay (yaya! buying out of season is brilliant) and also a kagool for tropical monsoon TN. Which I woke up in the night and realised it didn't say 'breathable' in the description so I will be VERY sweaty inside this thing. Hmmm. Today I am bidding on a proper-job running top (can't/won't buy them new because it's all Nike and Adidas etc and they, as far as I am aware, are made in sweatshops, most possibly by children, most possibly in TN...) because so far I have been working out in vest-tops which will not do for 13 whole miles..

I need some water and lip-balm.

I hope I work today! Must work! I must visualise writing later about how much work I have done. Today I am going to work on keeping a positive attitude as well. Hence breakfast - good for energy and brain juice. I used to eat it all the time but in the last month or so stopped and got grumpy so I have started again.

x J