Apparently I have to do the viva at 36 weeks preggo or wait until June (when I have a one month old baby WTF) or September (with a four month old. Still massively WTF).
A) I will have to take my baby into the viva at that stage to breastfeed. Getting my boobs out in front on staring stranges and my Sup, however discreetly, is not an option. (especially with a one month old still working out his latch!!!!!) B) I will have had no sleep since May. C) WTF?! It makes me sad no-one seems to think about how having a baby is a life changing event. Like, I can't seem to be abel to say 'No, I can't do the viva in April or May because I am HAVING A FUCKING BABY.' I don't have a nanny and I AM the bloody lactating mother so can hardly hand the baby over to someone else for a day or two. It just isn't an issue in male-dominated aca-fucking-demia.
I know people could say 'oh well, you got pregnant it's your bed' bla bla but actually it is not typical to have a viva nearly five months after submission. I was told the viva would be in feb/march - 2-3 months after submission which is pretty normal and I could ballet dance to that in this second trimester of pregnancy. Nor did I baulk at doing it when 34 weeks pregnant (altho that would be shit too but far more copeable, with time to do the corrections before needing to focus on the imminent hell that is labour). Now I could be facing a viva 6-9 months after submission which in itself is shit. 9 months after would be awful wouldn't it - you can't get on with your life while it is still there, waiting to be done :( I couldn't enjoy my new baby and life. You would forget what the fuck it was all about and feel a need to keep working a bit here and there to keep your hand in :(. More lit would have come out so there would be that much more catching up to do beforehand. And, tbh, by 9 months wouldn't anyone have lost enthusiasm for it?! I am looking outside of uni now and even dislike going into my study for the stressy memories - and I only handed in a month ago!
FFS. I am so gutted. So I have had to chipperly say let's go for the April date. It is the best out of a bad bunch. I do NOT want this PhD anywhere near my baby. It was so stressful last time with Bean and trying to bloody work and act like I hadn't even had a baby. It really fucks me off.
I know this is tantrummy but then again, that is what this blog is about really. I honestly don't bloody care about it, it is just getting on my bloody nerves now :(.
Grrrrrrr.
I must think. Could later be better. If I go in April and come out with loads of corrections then what, exactly, was the point of going in April because I shan't be able to do them. Tho I might be able to make a start and organise myself some to enjoy the newborn bit (or at least relax into the hell of sleepless nights). I think knowing what is in store would be useful. And yeah, Sept would not be cool. I wouldn't be able to think about a viva until bubs is about 6 mths and life has settled down a bit. My friends who have two children have been dribbling, crying desperate wrecks until about 6 months and they are on maternity leave! DB and I have argued so much since having Bean about each having time to work. I cannot and will not go back there (life is MUCH happier since finishing the PhD!)
Oh FFS.
x J
A) I will have to take my baby into the viva at that stage to breastfeed. Getting my boobs out in front on staring stranges and my Sup, however discreetly, is not an option. (especially with a one month old still working out his latch!!!!!) B) I will have had no sleep since May. C) WTF?! It makes me sad no-one seems to think about how having a baby is a life changing event. Like, I can't seem to be abel to say 'No, I can't do the viva in April or May because I am HAVING A FUCKING BABY.' I don't have a nanny and I AM the bloody lactating mother so can hardly hand the baby over to someone else for a day or two. It just isn't an issue in male-dominated aca-fucking-demia.
I know people could say 'oh well, you got pregnant it's your bed' bla bla but actually it is not typical to have a viva nearly five months after submission. I was told the viva would be in feb/march - 2-3 months after submission which is pretty normal and I could ballet dance to that in this second trimester of pregnancy. Nor did I baulk at doing it when 34 weeks pregnant (altho that would be shit too but far more copeable, with time to do the corrections before needing to focus on the imminent hell that is labour). Now I could be facing a viva 6-9 months after submission which in itself is shit. 9 months after would be awful wouldn't it - you can't get on with your life while it is still there, waiting to be done :( I couldn't enjoy my new baby and life. You would forget what the fuck it was all about and feel a need to keep working a bit here and there to keep your hand in :(. More lit would have come out so there would be that much more catching up to do beforehand. And, tbh, by 9 months wouldn't anyone have lost enthusiasm for it?! I am looking outside of uni now and even dislike going into my study for the stressy memories - and I only handed in a month ago!
FFS. I am so gutted. So I have had to chipperly say let's go for the April date. It is the best out of a bad bunch. I do NOT want this PhD anywhere near my baby. It was so stressful last time with Bean and trying to bloody work and act like I hadn't even had a baby. It really fucks me off.
I know this is tantrummy but then again, that is what this blog is about really. I honestly don't bloody care about it, it is just getting on my bloody nerves now :(.
Grrrrrrr.
I must think. Could later be better. If I go in April and come out with loads of corrections then what, exactly, was the point of going in April because I shan't be able to do them. Tho I might be able to make a start and organise myself some to enjoy the newborn bit (or at least relax into the hell of sleepless nights). I think knowing what is in store would be useful. And yeah, Sept would not be cool. I wouldn't be able to think about a viva until bubs is about 6 mths and life has settled down a bit. My friends who have two children have been dribbling, crying desperate wrecks until about 6 months and they are on maternity leave! DB and I have argued so much since having Bean about each having time to work. I cannot and will not go back there (life is MUCH happier since finishing the PhD!)
Oh FFS.
x J
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