Thursday 5 January 2012

been working. crazy!

It is most odd, but I have been working pretty well today.

Not in a mindblowing way of intense PhD level concentration, and mostly with a hand stuck in a bag of mini cheddars but, still, working!

I can't believe it really.  In the old days I would finish a chapter and not be able to concentrate on anything other than gurning at the tele, having baths and getting drunk - oh, and sleeping - for two weeks!  It was chill time!  And here I am, finished the darned thing yesterday and am working on the next one today! 

Definitely shows that I am feelling the pressure ;0)

I haven't done much, and some of it was utterly futile but I have made progress and I know what I am coming back to on Saturday.  Sat I have to finish my rejigging of this old chapter so I can start next week on my new discussion chapter.  eek!

I am absolutely shattered today.  At the mo and out of nowhere I am suffering from insomnia until about 2am, when I finally nod off just as my baby is starting to become unsettled... so basically I am not really sleeping.  Am getting about 5 hours of interrupted sleep and has been like this for three nights now.  I would have a nap but I am too wired!  I feel like shit though and have to get my baby soon and be on form for him... make his tea, watch tv with him (harder than it sounds when you are shattered and trying not to nod off!) and play games and not be snappy or rubbish all when I am at my lowest energy levels.  Come 8pm I magically perk up and stay hyper until 1amish.  I know, I know I should work but I am tired, honest, I just can't sleep.  Seeing as it's confession time I keep getting a racing heart beat too.  Just out of nowhere I get all short of breath and my heart goes like the clappers.  Maybe I'm a bit stressed.  I don't feel it!  I need to go out running and stop eating mini cheddars...

This time next year all this will be a dream...  whoopeee!

So happy the wind and rain has stopped outside.  It has been ridiculously stormy!

x J

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

First of all a massive congrats on the FABULOUS PROGRESS!! Wahey! But Jayney, that doesn't sound good with your lack of sleep and RACING HEART! Eeek! I'm also someone who doesn't generally FEEL stressed but exhibits the physical symptoms nonetheless, so clearly I am stressed even if I don't acknowledge it. And you've got every reason to feel stressed right now! Not an awful lot you can do about the sleep situation I guess, what with the inevitable busy mind at the mo, but as a fellow runner I'd say definitely try to fit in even just a little run regularly. It clears the head after hours behind the computer, should give you another dose of energy for the kiddie shift, and help towards the sleep situation too. Do look after yourself. A PhD is a big thing, but it's not worth sacrificing your health for. Take care, B x

Numpty said...

Aw thanks, you are lovely! Am going to get running again aye, and stop drinking tea after 6pm. Hope this will help. Am ok, not stressed, but definitely feel 'on' when I am trying to to switch off. I am fine though :0) Good luck dearie!
x J