Tuesday 20 December 2011

Pushed on through

Aw I am chuffed with myself today.

I didn't do as much work as I would have liked.  i did a lot of internet reading of shit.

However, I did also have a horrible realisation that my chapter was not going to work as beautifully as I had thought, having read through my interviews I realised that the info I *have* does not correlate with the grand statements my ch intro was making!  hmmmpf.  I did wonder what the hell I was going to do but then made myself go back to it time and time again (i kept veering off) and finally have started writing it again and feel like I am standing on firmer ground.  I was motivated by the thought of spending this evening with my bean and feeling all cross and worried about work and know that will spill over into our relationship.  Also hate the idea of coming back to it tomorrow still feeling clueless.  I still feel pretty clueless but I have 10 minutes to sort myself out and jot down some notes on what to do tomorrow so I am not worrying about it tonight.  If DB is around I will try and do 2 hours of work tonight but don't think he is so am not planning on it...  Am basically not worrying too much about how I say things (being pretty colloquial in places!) but just geting the ideas and quotes down, and the word count UP!  I will refine with more textured analysis and lovely namedropping of pertinent authors at a later date.  For now, I just need it to have some kind of shape to work with :0)

Am feeling really pleased with myself.  Normally I would have had a meltdown and stropped off somewhere.  But I don't have time to be a diva!

x J

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