Thursday 8 December 2011

Quite ok

Today has whizzed by!  And I can still work tomorrow yay!

I printed off me chapters and have read through them and am puzzling over the order I should have them in.  Until I know this I shan't be able to write the rest of my current chapter as I need to know what I can talk about without treading on my (own) toes or being repetitive...  I have tried writing but to no avail.

I feel bizarrely in control.  In fact, I felt so warm and fuzzy in my brain I had a bath!  A bath!  I remember pre-Bean I used to have baths as an alternative place in which to have thinky time but no time these days ;0)  i have been 'on' since sunday, either looking after bean or working and so I think I just needed a bit of chill time.  I never do anything for 'me' these days as if i have time for that it is used working!  Anyway, I feel nice and not as wired and edgy as I have done so that's good.  If I get Bean in bed before 9pm tonight (! I know but his wind-down time is taking forever at the mo) I shall do some work tonight - thinky stuff if my brain has come back, references if not.  I think that the chapter order thing will just come to me when my subconscious has finished dealing with it.  It doesn't feel like something i can badger myself into working out, it will just happen.  I shall try and mull it over when I walk to get my bean.

I am pleased I sat and read all the chapters though and am very,very pleased that they seem to be just fine.  I worked out that they were around 27,000 words worth of work: well over a Master's dissertation, just for three chapters!  I can't wait to have number four done (realistically should get it done on saturday) and then print it out and add it to my pile of PhDness!  It is brilliant seeing the work there.  It puts it all into perspective and makes it easy to refer to.  It is all so abstract just being on the computer but as a pile of chapters it is brill.  All i have to do is keep writing chapters, add them to the pile, write an abstract, print my refs off endnote and then shove in some appendices and the first draft is done!  Woooooo yeah!

I wish I could bottle this simple optimism.

x J

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Congrats on the progress Jayney! So good to be reading about you finally getting there and things falling into place, and the fact that the thesis CAN actually happen! After a shitty day in PhD-land for myself it's heartening to see that clearly one day it'll all be ok. Just as it's now happening for you after your own shitty days in PhD-land. Very happy for you - and a glimmer of hope for me :) xB

Numpty said...

haha, I never thought I would be inspiring :0) Am just a whiny mess, so indeed if I can have a good day we ALL CAN! Hurray!

keep plugging on B, we shall get there. Well, we have to really ;0) Keep me informed with your progress!
x J